#I just didn't want player lists to get too long when they're already quite long in places

[factorialsotherfandoms]

*picks my head up at the back of the class and realises the bell has already rung and everyone is gone already* .....so about that gifty fics huh. i trust your judgement and have no real Requests but if you do want something to go off..... maypahs agatha or arthur? arnaldo, even? ^_^

Dear Cal, Merry Christmas, and thanks for once again causing possibly the weirdest fic of the requests round. And that includes the Victoriana with magitech I did for Curly.

Everyone else, a merry christmas to you too!

ao3 link: [link]

Senhor Fritz is visiting again. They always know when he is visiting, because the sister and the Father both get a lot nicer a few days before. Even if one of them cuts another they are not hit for it - well, no, the punishment just comes after Senhor Fritz is gone.

So, Gal does not really care for it; he has better things to spend his time on than washed out actors, like making use of the quiet upstairs to dig out his mp3 player, and cram the music of his beloved Dragões Metálicos into his ears.

Relaxing as he is, he does not hear Senhor Fritz come in.; he does not realise he is there at all, until the man is standing by his bedside. Sister Thelma follows, likely having shown him up, but loiters silently in the shadows of the door.

"Gal, yes?" Senhor Fritz asks.

So much for a quiet afternoon.

Still, Gal knows the price for showing up the orphanage in front of their benefactor.

And only Henri enjoys not having skin.

"Yeah?" Gal pulls one headphone out, looking at the man.

"I heard it was your birthday soon," Senhor Fritz says. "I came with a gift."

A gift?

Last time Gal received a gift from Senhor Fritz, it was his beloved mp3 player.

"Sure?"

He is handed an envelope, neatly sealed with actual, genuine wax.

"You should open it now," Senhor Fritz tells him. "So there is time to put things in order."

Putting things in order? Way to talk like they're all about to be murdered.

Getting murdered seems like a good shout, though, perhaps even a riot.

Gal's nails are not as long as he wishes as he slips one onto the paper, tearing it open. The card he ignores entirely, but with it...

Two paper tickets, scan lines and all. Dated for his birthday and-

"The Dragões Metálicos tour?!"

Senhor Fritz laughs slightly, "yes."

He catches himself from a 'fuck yeah' just in time, keeping his mouth shut.

"I am aware they are your favourite," Senhor Fritz gestres to how all of Gal’s clothes are covered in their logo.

"Who is the other one for?" He asks, seeing it lists an under 18 on it. So not with an adult? Already?

"For whomever you like; I've already spoken to Sister Thelma, and ensured you will have permission to go. Without an adult, so long as you are home on time."

Not that Gal needed permission, exactly; even if he didn't have tickets he had been planning to sneak out and break into the concert. This just makes it more convenient.

"Manners, Gal-Sal," Sister Thelma's sharp voice cuts in.

"It's alright, Thelma; I am aware this is a lot for a lad of his background. Just give him a moment to collect himself."

Collect himself? Gal feels ready to vibrate out of his very skin. Tickets! Permission! He can even take some of the others and not be beaten for it later! In his giddiness, he feels somewhat faint.

"Thank you Senhor Fritz!" For once in his life, the thanks comes both easily and genuinely.

"Quite alright, my boy."

There is a little gesture from Senhor Fritz's hand; Gal takes it as permission to run off, already yelling for Henri and Nina to come and see what he has. They do not understand the value of his treasure - tickets!! To a Dragões Metálicos concert!! - but they come anyway.

And there is only one other ticket. Surely the duo can compete for who gets to join him? For an evening away from this hell hole?

To leave is about all that any of them have ever wanted, after all.

[demdozeguys]

Strap in for a long one, because it's time for:

REVIEWING AND RANKING EVERY GAME I GOT FROM THE STEAM SUMMER SALE

ramblings under the cut:

UNRANKED: ULTRA STREET FIGHTER IV

okay look I know I said I'd be ranking all of these but putting a fighting game up against six linear-progression single-player adventure type games feels a bit unfair.

as for whether I liked it: yeah it's alright. it's street fighter, it's fun. only time will tell how much my brother and I will get out of it, but I'm already feeling like I don't like it quite as much as 5. how much of that is due to 4 not having Urien is anyone's guess.

#6: CROW COUNTRY

I'm gonna be honest I didn't fuck with this game nearly as much as I thought I would.

maybe it's because I'm new to the genre. maybe it's because I've been spoiled by autosave. or maybe it's just because I can't aim to save my life. but losing upwards of 20 minutes of progress every time some creature I failed to hit or juke tagged me one too many times got frustrating pretty fast.

I didn't hate my time with Crow Country. the environments are gorgeous, the story kept me intrigued, and filling out my mental list of "oh shit I can go here now"s was still satisfying. if this is your thing don't let me dissuade you, I just wasn't built for it.

#5: KAMIKO

Kamiko is decent fun, but there's not really a whole lot to say about it. It's a short and sweet zelda-esque game where the meat of the playtime comes from trying to go through it as fast as possible, and as you'll see later I happen to enjoy going fast. enjoyable, but not super meaty. if you like routing and time management give it a shot.

#4: PONY ISLAND

Alright, this is where we get into the Good Shit.

Pony Island is a game in which you play a game called Pony Island made by The Devil From The Bible. every few minutes there's some new weird meta setpiece to keep you on your toes, plus the code puzzles and pony sections between are solid fun on their own. it's a great time. and if you're interested, there's a pretty solid reward for getting 100%.

if I had to dock points, it didn't seem to have much in the way of replayability, but that's not a huge dealbreaker. I really need to get my hands on Inscryption now.....

#3: SPOOKY'S JUMPSCARE MANSION REMASTERED

I'm not normally big on horror but Spooky's kept me coming back. despite going into it already knowing what all the specimens did, they managed to keep me on the edge of my seat because you never know when they're going to show up. combine the legitimate building terror with an offbeat and self-aware sense of humor and you have a damn fun package.

it's worth noting that as of writing this, I've only completed the main story. the DLC campaigns probably won't affect the final ranking? but I have a feeling they'll make me appreciate the game more.

#2: PEPPER GRINDER

Pepper Grinder is fucking awesome.

The level design is great, the soundtrack rips, and just moving around with the core gimmick of "what if you could drill and then jump out" is so good. I just really wish there was more of it.

I was able to get all the major in-level collectibles and reach the end in under 3 hours. the bulk of my playtime came from the time trials, which do manage to hit a sweet spot of encouraging you to push yourself without requiring CBT perfection. demolishing the gold medal on the final boss took me well over an hour's worth of attempts and may have been one of the most viscerally satisfying challenges I've ever completed in a game.

Pepper Grinder is really, really cool. But if it had another world's worth of levels it would be even cooler.

#1: CHICORY: A COLORFUL TALE

Man. I fucking love Chicory.

The vibes are immacculate. The story made me really feel for these gay little animals. The soundtrack is delightful (Lena Raine, everybody!). The exploration is rewarding. The painting mechanics made me actively want to go back to areas I'd already been to and recolor them better than I did originally, which is like. not something most games do. You can even draw penises everywhere if you want. There's something for everybody.

I'm having a hard time putting down exactly what made me fall head over heels for this game as much as I did - especially when I wasn't expecting to going into it. Maybe it was just in the right place at the right time. No matter how it cheated the system, Chicory is easily the best game I picked up.

And that's that. this was my first time doing something like this (especially on tumblr) so it felt kinda weird but idk lmk if I planted any seeds in your brain

[stormblessed95]

Hi, sorry if it's late, but can I ask for your persoal top favorite queer books and (maybe) your top fav fanfiction (from any fandom but your all time fav)? Thanks so much.....

Also why do you think mlm or wlw romance is more interesting than mlw (het) romance?

Feel free if you want to ignore the last ask, thanks for your blog....

Why do I personally enjoy gay romances to het ones? Preference and taste probably. I also tend to enjoy the angst, longing, tropes, passion, etc in the way its written more than I do in the ways those things are written between a straight couple. And that's not to say I don't enjoy straight romances either! I have plently of het ships I love too, and a few good romances that aren't gay 😂 I just have a preference, and that's okay! As for recommendations!! I have a LOTS! If you want to tell me about what YOU like to read, I can give even better recs. But for in general, some of my favorites...

I have posts about QUITE A FEW here already that you can check out (please do)!:

^ you'll find queer characters in most of the lists of recs honestly at least somewhere. BUT I do have posts specific for Sapphic, Achillian and Ace recs there. So start there!

I'll also throw in that I'm recently quite obsessed with fantasy Sapphics with swords in my books lately! So books like "The Jasmine Throne." "This is How You Lose The Time War." "Priory of the Orange Tree." "Gideon the Ninth." "Girls of Paper and Fire" and "Legends and Lattes."

Come back for me if you want more!

And some of my favorite fics (of various fandoms! Exciting!) In no particular order, I'll link a few for you!

That Isn't Nothing by Taekookschanbaek

(I KNOW OKAY, in my defense I didn't realize the authors name until AFTER I read and loved the fic lmfao but it IS SO good, I promise lol)

Fandom: All For The Game

Ship: Andrew x Neil

Summary: "A look into the lives of pro exy players Andrew Minyard and Neil Josten. The world says they hate each other, but when Andrew gets transferred to Neil's team, their teammates begin seeing something else between them."

In Which Neil is a PR Nightmare by CoverYourEyes

Fandom: All For The Game

Ship: Andrew x Neil

Summary: "Eve was not the best person in the world. Sometimes she didn’t hold the elevator open when she saw people rushing to catch it from the other side of the lobby. Cutting the line at Starbucks was a semi-regular action. But Eve did not deserve to be Neil fucking Josten's publicist.

**********

Or, the one where Neil does what he wants, picks fights with reporters, discovers Twitter, breaks the internet, and really shouldn't be allowed out of his house. Andrew does nothing to discourage him."

The Men In Apartment 22B by jjmash

Fandom: All For The Game

Ship: Andrew x Neil

Summary: "Andrew and Neil's new neighbors are extremely confused about the two mysterious men in 22B. Are they dating? Are they in the mafia? Are they rival assassins who've fallen in love? As always, the truth is stranger than fiction."

Blame It On My Youth by youreyestheyglow

(Locked fic, you need an account. This fic is THICK but it's by far one of the best Andriel fics I've ever read or just in general. SO GOOD and so emotional and so sweet and so cute)

Fandom: All For The Game

Ship: Andrew x Neil

Summary: "10 years after the end of The King's Men, Andrew and Neil have decided to foster a kid. They have low expectations for themselves--they're not exactly ideal parenting material--but at the very least, the kid will be safe with them. But neither Andrew nor Neil do temporary very well.

Full disclosure: highly character-driven, minimally plot-driven."

(Wangxian and MDZS IS my newest hyperfixation and I love the juniors dynamics fics so much lol)

The One-Body Problem by metisket

Fandom: MDZS

Ship: Wei Ying x Lan Zhan

Summary: "The good news is that Lan Jingyi has found a mentor, friend, and constant companion through the difficulties in life.

The bad news is that that’s because he’s been accidentally possessed by the Yiling Patriarch."

Operation Old Men by Chiharu

Fandom: MDZS

Ship: Wei Ying x Lan Zhan

Summary: "An ill-fated parent teacher conference reunites Jin Ling's wayward uncle with Sizhui's father. AKA: A matchmaking disaster as told by Jin Ling, Sizhui, and Jingyi."

And Time Is But A Paper Moon by Sami

Fandom: MDZS

Ship: Wei Ying x Lan Zhan

Summary: ""Zewu-Jun. You once told me about a house surrounded by gentians, where you visited once a month, and how Lan Zhan still waited there, even when the door no longer opened."

Xichen feels light-headed. He feels shocked, and angry. He has never told anyone such a thing, but Lan Zhan is giving Xichen a look of utter betrayal.

"You told him?" Lan Zhan whispers. "When?"

Wei Wuxian takes Lan Zhan's hand. "About twenty years from now."

*******

Wei Wuxian starts again from the beginning."

(the first time) he kissed a boy by buzzcut__season

Fandom: Sk8 The Infinity

Ship: Langa x Reki

Summary: "Reki is insecure about his lack of kissing experience. Langa just wants to help him feel like he's good enough, even if teaching Reki to kiss means breaking his own heart."

The Gambler by MooeyDooey

Fandom: Sk8 The Infinity

Ship: Joe x Cherry

Summary: "Joe and Cherry run into a problem. Conspiracy theories have started to surface in some fan forums of "S" that the two of them are secretly dating one another.

Both of them agree that the idea is absurd, but can't agree on which one of them would be the better boyfriend if they actually were dating. So they decide to have a competition, to see who can be the better romantic partner when pitted up against one another."

The One Where Nico Has 30 Boyfriends by a_million_stars

Fandom: PJO

Ship: Will x Nico

Summary: "“Seriously? Me and Lester?” Nico looked ready to kill him. “If you keep speaking to me I think I’m going to throw up.”

Or, a new friend from college desperately tries to figure out who Nico's secret boyfriend is. He messes up. A lot. If only Nico didn't have so many weirdly close friends from high school."

Burgundy (not Maroon) by Eggplant_Crusader

Fandom: Wednesday

Ship: Wednesday x Enid

Summary: "They're driving each other insane. It can't last. One of these days, one of them will surely kill the other. Enid wants to avoid that. Wednesday can't wait."

Like Everything Glows by Annie_Vi

(One of the only people I'll read RPS fics from. Everything this woman writes is gold, this is my favorite though, and the first i read of hers)

Fandom: BTS

Ship: Jimin x Jungkook

Summary: "Jeon Jeongguk watches the sun rise and set on the water every day without wondering what may lie far beneath the surface. One nighttime walk along the beach upheaves his entire life, sending his human morals into a tailspin as he questions what his beliefs really are."

(I need more shows with good wlw ships that have good fics too!! If anyone has any good recs, send them my way!! Also there are so many good fics I've read that i realized i never bookmarked and now i cant remember what they are. Lesson learned. Bookmark everything! Thanks for the ask!!)

[iturnintoabear]

Every DM picks the battles they want to have at their table. Clearly, this one is yours, and this is no doubt you expressing frustration that you've told them this countless times and they're still doing it. You press on into the fray, continuing to have this fight with them and will until the end of time.

I don't understand it, if I can be honest. Especially since Detect Magic is only available to magic casters who have it AND stock it, and Arcana Checks are available to everyone. The way a player may have asked this to avoid wasting everyone's time by not explaining they didn't stock Detect Magic, so they requested to do this instead—and you want to fight about it? Which inevitably leads to an argument with the rest of the table about whether they should be able to request checks (which some of them HAVE TO DO, like Rogues looking for traps), whether Detect Magic should be usable this way, whether there's a better spell on someone else's list that would work better, and on and on. And on some more.

I play barbarians because I like to tank, and there is nothing that pisses me off more at any table than DMs picking fights and having arguments with magic casters. I already have to sit there while each and every one of them takes twice to three times as long as I do on their turn arguing about mechanics. I already do enough sitting there and listening to magic casters navel gaze and argue with each other—patiently and without complaint, because I understand this is what they get out of the game. This is inherent to playing a magic caster, to some extent. The ticky tacky of magic has to be decided via discussion. I have done it as a DM. If there was a way around it, I would've found it by now.

DO NOT SMACK THE HORNETS NEST BECAUSE YOU WANT TO POWER TRIP. AT THAT POINT, I'M NOT GOING TO BE MAD AT THE PLAYERS—I'M GOING TO BE MAD AT YOU BECAUSE YOU STARTED IT.

But if you're going to pick a flight, don't lose. Right? That's what we learn from every other sphere of our lives? If you give up, it means you lost and people don't respect you. It means you can never let this go, even if you don't care anymore, even when it means everyone loses.

I don't have it in me to do this as a DM. Some of you need to spend more time with new players, children learning to play, and problem players. I had a problem player who was both new and a child, who I didn't cut because they were a child, for the longest time. He ended up having to quit because of his grades at school, and this was after multiple discussions with the other players about whether the time had finally come. He interrupted me when I was talking. He interrupted other players. He had no sense of timing and would argue with the other players about how to pay their characters better. He argued with me constantly. I gave him every chance to learn better and do better because I didn't want to hand him off as a problem player to another table. I wanted to take the time to teach him better because the world is a mean place. I tried to help him, even when it became obvious that he wasn't going to change. And he didn't appreciate what I was offering to him the vast majority of the time.

When you have that experience as a DM, these stupid, petty arguments become obvious for what they are. You don't have the time or energy for kicking hornets nests. You master the art of becoming unbotherable by anything your players do. You realize you can give your players the freedom to manage themselves and to be reasonable, not to take things too far or break the game, if you just get out of their way. Trust your players. Let them tell the story they want to tell. Let them choose the ways they want to pass/fail in their Choose Your Own Adventure. If they roll a 1 on a skill they're supposed to be good at, which will happen from time to time, it's that much funnier. Let the dice provide the consequences so it doesn't have to be you.

From one DM to another: it's not going to kill you, and your problems could be so much worse.

No, you can't "do an Arcana check" to see if there's magic around. There's an actual way in the rules to see if magic is afoot, it's called the detect magic spell.

Also, ask me if you can do any kind of check again and I will bite your head off in real life.

[battingonjakku]

A guide to the 18 counties and why you should/shouldn’t support each one (version 2.0)

Hello! It’s been a couple of years since I did this original guide, so I thought it was time for an updated version as after all, a lot has happened since then. 

All the confirmed overseas players I’ve found have been included, the most significant Kolpaks (not all though, because there are many), and the most recent England/Ireland/Scotland players as well…and then some just to look out for.

Without further ado then, here is a relatively comprehensive guide to choosing your county for the year ahead…

Derbyshire

Overseas & Kolpak: Logan van Beek, Kane Richardson (T20), Ravi Rampaul

England/Ireland/Scotland: Mark Watt

England prospects: Matt Critchley, Hamidullah Qadri

Why you should support them: Who doesn’t love an underdog? Quite a bit of young talent around, including in Hamidullah Qadri the first county cricketer born in the 21st century (welp)

Why you shouldn’t support them: They always seem to fly under the radar, and I still haven’t met a Derbyshire supporter (please reveal yourselves if you are out there!)

Durham

Overseas & Kolpak: Cameron Bancroft, D’Arcy Short (T20)

England/Ireland/Scotland: Ben Stokes, Mark Wood, Stuart Poynter

England prospects: Josh Coughlin, Matty Potts

Why you should support them: One of the leading producers of England players over the years, and who have suffered a lot at the hands of the ECB. Who doesn’t have a soft spot for Durham?

Why you shouldn’t support them: It’s been a tough few years due to off-field circumstances, and a lot of their top players have left in the process. Likely to struggle again.

Essex

Overseas & Kolpak: Peter Siddle, Adam Zampa (T20), Mohammad Amir (T20), Simon Harmer, Cameron Delport, Matt Quinn

England/Ireland/Scotland: Alastair Cook, Tom Westley, Ravi Bopara

England prospects: Jamie Porter, Daniel Lawrence, Nick Browne, Sam Cook

Why you should support them:  The place to get your Alastair Cook fix post-England retirement. They’re also a lovely bunch of lads, and with their unexpected 2017 CC win have become one of the division’s leading teams.

Why you shouldn’t support them: Have a notable Kolpak contingent, and are just one of those teams for whom when things go wrong, it happens spectacularly.

Glamorgan

Overseas & Kolpak: Shaun Marsh, Marnus Labuschagne, Colin Ingram, Marchant de Lange

England/Ireland/Scotland: Ruaidhri Smith, Timm van der Gugten (well, Netherlands)

England prospects: Prem Sisodiya

Why you should support them: Flying the flag for Wales as the only county not based in England, and another underdog to root for as well. A decent pace bowling attack that should see them improve on last year.

Why you shouldn’t support them: Continually struggling, last year coming bottom of the County Championship and with no trophies in a long time.

Gloucestershire

Overseas & Kolpak: Michael Klinger (T20), Dan Worrall  

England/Ireland/Scotland:  Adrian Neill

England prospects: Ryan Higgins, Ben Charlesworth

Why you should support them: A team with an exceptional history in short-form cricket, and though they tend to be underdogs nowadays, can still prove themselves worth more than the sum of their parts.

Why you shouldn’t support them: Have tended to stay mid-table in Division Two over the past few years without making huge strides forward. Though known for limited overs success, form can be variable.     

Hampshire

Overseas & Kolpak: Aiden Markram, Kyle Abbott, Fidel Edwards, Rilee Rossouw

England/Ireland/Scotland: Liam Dawson, Mason Crane, James Vince

England prospects: Sam Northeast, James Fuller, Aneurin Donald

Why you should support them: Often strong performers in the shortest forms, winning the one day cup last year and having been regulars at T20 finals day in the last decade.

Why you shouldn’t support them:  Tend to scrape their Division One safety in the CC every year, so prepare for the stress. Also one of the counties people love to hate, thanks in part to high profile Kolpak signings and the attitude of their chairman.

Kent

Overseas & Kolpak: Matt Renshaw, Adam Milne (T20), Mohammed Nabi (T20), Heino Kuhn

England/Ireland/Scotland: Joe Denly, Sam Billings

England prospects: Daniel Bell-Drummond, Zak Crawley  

Why you should support them: A steadily improving county in all formats, reaching the one day final and being promoted from the CC last year. Soon to be 43, the evergreen Darren Stevens is also worthy of a mention here too.

Why you shouldn’t support them: Another team with a notable Kolpak contingent in addition to those above. A team with little experience of the first division as well, so who will be facing a challenge.

Lancashire

Overseas & Kolpak: Joe Burns, Glenn Maxwell, James Faulkner (T20), Dane Vilas

England/Ireland/Scotland: James Anderson, Jos Buttler, Haseeb Hameed, Keaton Jennings, Liam Livingstone

England prospects: Saqib Mahmood, Alex Davies, Matthew Parkinson

Why you should support them:  With a strong squad it would be a surprise not to see them promoted this year, especially with the bowling attack that managed to pick up the most bonus points last year. It also looks like they’ve final gotten rid of that god-awful green kit, too.

Why you shouldn’t support them: It’s Lancashire, what more is there to say? (I had to get a dig in here somewhere, didn’t I?)

Leicestershire:

Overseas & Kolpak: Mohammed Abbas, Colin Ackermann, Mark Cosgrove

England prospects: Will Davis

Why you should support them:  Just lovely, and definitely improving as a team after many years at the bottom of the pack. Always developing young, talented players. The only ground I’ve been to where I’ve been offered a bag of Sweets Or Weed. 

Why you shouldn’t support them: Well known for their top players leaving, and another big exodus took place at the end of the season. Supporting them can be painful, too.

Middlesex

Overseas & Kolpak: Mujeeb Ur Rahman (T20), AB de Villiers (T20), Ross Taylor

England/Ireland/Scotland: Eoin Morgan, Steven Finn, Toby Roland-Jones, Tim Murtagh, Paul Stirling, Sam Robson

England prospects: Nick Gubbins, Ethan Bamber, Tom Barber, Tom Helm, Max Holden

Why you should support them: A squad with a lot of English and Irish talent and hot prospects who will be striving for promotion this year. And there’s the Lord’s factor, because where better to watch cricket?

Why you shouldn’t support them: Have underperformed in the two years following their CC win, and it’s best not to even mention the shorter forms. 

Northamptonshire

Overseas & Kolpak: Temba Bavuma, Faheem Ashraf (T20), Jason Holder, Blessing Muzarabani, Richard Levi

England/Ireland/Scotland: Kyle Coetzer

England prospects: Ben Curran

Why you should support them: A team without big resources who have become one of the more successful T20 teams in the country. Also, I love Temba Bavuma in general and just want that stated here.

Why you shouldn’t support them: That T20 success that made them famous went spectacularly downhill last year, finishing well adrift at the bottom of the group. Have lost important players since, too.

Nottinghamshire

Overseas & Kolpak: Dan Christian (T20), James Pattinson

England/Ireland/Scotland: Stuart Broad, Jake Ball, Alex Hales, Ben Duckett

England prospects: Joe Clarke, Zak Chappell, Matthew Carter, Tom Moores, Ben Slater

Why you should support them: A team with a lot of England talent from the past, present, and likely the future. Have strengthened their squad a lot over the winter and will be looking to challenge on all fronts.

Why you shouldn’t support them: Not too popular for buying a lot of their talent, particularly with their winter recruitment. Have also underperformed in the longer format despite a strong squad.

Somerset

Overseas & Kolpak: Azhar Ali, Jerome Taylor (T20)

England/Ireland/Scotland: Jack Leach, Dom Bess, Craig Overton, Josh Davey

England prospects: Jamie Overton, George Bartlett

Why you should support them: A well-liked county, by everyone really apart from the ECB. Also the home of Marcus Trescothick, making centuries into his forties, and probably the best place in the country for spin bowling.

Why you shouldn’t support them: It always ends in pain, doesn’t it? A great track record for finishing high among the runners up, but not getting over the line, which has also returned among the last couple of seasons.

Surrey

Overseas & Kolpak: Aaron Finch, Dean Elgar, Morne Morkel

England/Ireland/Scotland: Sam Curran, Tom Curran, Ollie Pope, Rory Burns, Liam Plunkett, Ben Foakes, Jason Roy, Mark Stoneman 

England prospects: Amar Virdi, Will Jacks, Conor McKerr

Why you should support them: England players a plenty, with many coming through the academy system at the moment. The reigning champions of the CC and the favourites to win again, and should compete in the other formats.

Why you shouldn’t support them: One of the definitive love-to-hate counties among the 18, and another who like Notts are regularly called out on their spending.

Sussex

Overseas & Kolpak: Rashid Khan (T20), Mir Hamza, David Wiese, Stiaan van Zyl

England/Ireland/Scotland: Chris Jordan, Tymal Mills

England prospects: Jofra Archer, George Garton, Delray Rawlins

Why you should support them: An up-and-coming team, coached by the wonderful Jason Gillespie. Particularly exciting fast-bowling stocks, and last year’s T20 runners up who will want to go one better. Also, Luke Wright.  

Why you shouldn’t support them: For whatever reason, they tend to be bad at 50 over cricket, so probably not the team to root for if you’re after that Lord’s final.

Warwickshire

Overseas & Kolpak: Jeetan Patel, Ashton Agar (T20)

England/Ireland/Scotland: Chris Woakes, Olly Stone, Ian Bell

England prospects: Will Rhodes, Ed Pollock, Sam Hain, Henry Brookes, Dom Sibley     

Why you should support them: A likeable team, as they would be with Chris Woakes and Ian Bell. After a few years with an aging squad, now have quite a few young players who have either come through or been given a second chance from elsewhere.

Why you shouldn’t support them: Though they’ve bounced straight back from division two, they really crashed out during their relegation season so their return to the top flight might be a learning curve.

Worcestershire

Overseas & Kolpak: Callum Ferguson, Martin Guptil (T20), Wayne Parnell

England/Ireland/Scotland: Moeen Ali

England prospects: Pat Brown, Josh Tongue, Dillon Pennington

Why you should support them: A team with a lot of strong homegrown young talent, who won the nation’s hearts on their way to their T20 Blast win in 2018. Led by Moeen Ali, and if you don’t appreciate them for that then what’s up with you mate?

Why you shouldn’t support them: The ultimate yo-yo team, constantly being promoted or relegated whilst rarely staying in one place, so not one to support if you don’t want the sadness every other year.

Yorkshire

Overseas & Kolpak: Duanne Olivier

England/Ireland/Scotland: Joe Root, Jonny Bairstow, Adil Rashid, David Willey, Gary Ballance

England prospects: Ben Coad, Matthew Fisher, Tom Kohler-Cadmore, Harry Brook

Why you should support them: They’re my team and I would die for them, the best team you can support. In seriousness though, they feature a lot of England players from past and present and tend to challenge across all competitions in some degree. Look strongest in the shorter forms.

Why you shouldn’t support them: Another love-to-hate county, as us Yorkshire fans do tend to go on about our successes. It has been a tricky couple of years as well, with a struggling batting line-up and no major reinforcements on that front.

[patchun]

after many hours in UM and 1cc'ing with every character, i can finally present my card tier list! some of these rankings are based on personal preference. for instance, some tier lists have placed remilia at s tier, and i don't DISAGREE with that. it's a really good card, but i just don't enjoy it as much. so in a way, this is very much "the casual player's tier list". i will explain some things below if you're interested:

S tier

Saki is in S tier because her card is ESSENTIAL, in my opinion. The damage difference is really important for every character, and at least as far as I can tell, it doesn't drop off late-game, either. If someone informs me that it does drop off when you hit full power, i'll be removing it.

Now you may ask: why Miko? Sumireko and Piece are so good, and you just talked about how good Remilia is. Well, I like Miko because with those other cards, I tend to accidentally try to use them as death-bombs. And of course, that never works. None of the active cards function as death bombs, so that false sense of comfort does me in more times than not. For that reason, Miko's active is good for me, because if you want to use it well, you have to use it preemptively. There are cards I know I struggle with, or midboss sections like stage 4, 5 and 6 mid - that Miko can handle so long as you use it at the right time. Byakuren isn't ESSENTIAL for Miko to be good, but it makes the active a lot better and reduces cooldown. If you have Miko, Byakuren probably goes to S tier.

A tier

That said, if you can't get a Miko, Sumireko is the second best bet. Her little circle of invulnerability can come in really clutch if you can use it at the right time (or remember to use it at all LOL). Byakuren would go in S if Sanae, the definitive best character (those who say Reimu is... you're crazy, snakes are too powerful), actually needed it. But she doesn't. Sanae's bomb is already insanely strong, and she doesn't really need Byakuren's help. That said. With Byakuren she becomes even stronger. So in retrospect, I think I should have put Byakuren in S tier. It just feels good, and that's important!

Speaking of remembering to use ability cards and bombs, though... Eirin can be a real run saver. Near the end of the run, you can start getting tired. If you have a silly death that could have been prevented, you may get discouraged. In those situations, it can be easy to snowball into a defeated spiral and keep dying over and over, without even bombing! But Eirin has the power to prevent that. More experienced players may find this one useless, but if you're just trying to 1cc these games for fun, Eirin can be quite good!

Mokou is good if you can afford her for obvious reasons - but be careful not to spend too much power later on to get this card. The later stages become quite difficult when you're low on power - you can go into a loss snowball really quickly because you can't clear enemies quick enough so the screen fills with bullets. To get Mokou you kind of need to be on a positive snowball.

B tier

For B tier, the top three equipment options really depend on who you're playing and what you need. For Sanae and Reimu, I think Mini-Hakkero is really good. Based on my testing, Hakkero is better than Needle and Missile, so in comparison, the other two are probably not worth it.

Sakuya B has in my experience been a GREAT card for both Marisa and Sakuya. The knives can be hard to aim, but they seem to do quite a bit of damage, so they really help to make up for the lack of range on both Sakuya and Marisa. Honestly though, I think they'd be fine on anyone. I haven't seen anyone talking about them but... yeah, they're underrated. Another thing is: they feel good.

Then, yin-yang orbs - I just think these are nice to have. They're better than snakes as equipment primarily because they can hit behind you, but I also think they have more consistent dps. Snakes miss a lot more often, which isn't really a big deal when you're Sanae who has 4 snake outlets, but it is a big deal when there's only one snake.

Alice doll - I'm pretty sure this is good. It moves quickly, homes in on stuff, can hit behind you, increases DPS, isn't too expensive. I like to take this when I see it.

Then, lives. Lives being only 80 money can be a big deal. In quite a few of my runs, I've taken lives 3/5 stages because I was just not very lucky with card selection, but I still managed. Lives are very strong if you can manage to not waste them and remember to use bombs.

Yachie's card is good if you can get it early - it wouldn't be in B tier except it's very, very cheap. Only 140 iirc. Now, the UFO... why did I choose that as my best bullet eraser? You may say: patchun, you've said in the past that Okina is really good for erasing bullets! And yes, you're right, you're right - but Okina is really only consistently useful for that one Chimata card, and once you learn that card, it's not very difficult to avoid. Plus, UFO can help with that card too! UFO doesn't give a fuck what it touches, it will erase it. It doesn't have a cooldown as far as I can tell, so it just erases everything in a circle around you constantly. I rank it this high up because UFO saved my ass MANY, many times against Misumaru, who is in my opinion the toughest boss in the game. UFO can destroy yin-yang orbs, so it makes several of her patterns a lot easier. Not even Sumireko can destroy yin-yang orbs. If you happen to see UFO and nothing else, and if you don't think you'll be distracted by it, try it out.

Few more comments

I think Sanae Frog is good on Marisa and Sakuya. Not better than the equipment cards in A tier, but good if you see it. I think anything that helps with Marisa and Sakuya's horrible range is great for them.

I've seen Sannyo card ranked pretty highly, and maybe if you get it early on it is, but I don't feel like it's worth a place in your starting deck, personally.

Mamizou can be good if you've already snowballed as a way to prevent a downfall. But I don't think she's worth picking up early at all. And Keiki's bullet erasing is good, but I found it often erased something I didn't need it to erase just to fail at erasing what I did need it to erase. Probably better than nothing, but far from a must-have, and the no-CD on the UFO and backdoor having very little CD makes them stand out for erasure.

I've heard good things about Aya, as well, but I personally never take my hand off the shoot key. Yuyuko's card may save you in a miracle situation but it's just very unlikely, honestly might be more startling than helpful. You generally know when you're about to die, so when you suddenly don't, it's like... your brain hasn't processed correctly, so you probably just die soon after. Sakuya left-right knives suck. Don't use them lol.

And finally, Utsuho is such a funny card. But... power is such an important resource in this game, with how snowball-y it is, that I could never justify using Utsuho on a serious attempt. I'd love to see some Utsuho challenge runs though.